I had to stand up to someone today.
A colleague at work was upset
because I had made a decision that he did not like.
I had tried for over a year to cultivate a relationship with this co-worker.
I had been friendly, deferential, and cooperative.
He had been domineering, manipulative, and mercurial.
He liked things his way- and he had been getting his way for eighteen years.
But, the boss retired, and we have someone new in charge, who is leveling the playing field.
He is trained to see where dysfunction resides in a company.
I talked to the boss openly about efforts to upgrade the office, and my co-worker’s efforts to stonewall me.
I spoke openly in front of the co-worker about the changes I sought. I got support from other key people in the company.
What I refused to do, was to ask my co-worker for permission to change the layout of the office.
He was quite unhappy this morning seeing the extra desk he liked to sit at in the morning gone.
He complained to the boss behind closed doors, but in the end the boss came out and supported my decision.
On the way home, I started down the usual path for me- worrying about the co-workers feelings.
This co-worker treats women as expendable nice to have around as long as they don’t get to uppity.
I saw his tactics as a way to keep me in line, and I went around him.
I also realized trying to keep on his “good side” was exhausting. It will be easier now.
I am a woman who is standing up for her self.
It’s about time.