“Young lovers seek perfection.
Old lovers learn the art of sewing shreds together
and of seeing beauty in a multiplicity of patches.”
Having discovered love at a more mature age, I can surely attest to the truth of this quote.
When we are young and in love, we are looking at all of our similarities. We are so excited that someone loves us for our perfection, and then we strive to hide the warts. We may not have many scars to hide, but when our weaknesses are eventually revealed we are devastated. This is not the person with whom we fell in love. We do not like our own vulnerabilities exposed, either.
The beauty of mature love is the realization that great love, lasting love comes from our weakness, not our strength. When we allow ourselves to become naked, our scars and warts slowly uncovered and revealed it is then that we truly love as the greatest teacher taught us. It is finally Love with a capital L. The shreds and the torn threads that are slowly knit together is either our history- alone and together. The hurts, the disappointments, the sorrows, and the joys are gathered up gently one by one and fused to one another. The stitches bring together patches; the patches are somewhat fragile and disconnected.
With time the patches are sewn together with Love. A pattern reveals itself, we create something new out of the old, the worn, the discarded. We cannot truly discard any experience in our lives no matter how hard we try. Each experience becomes woven into the pattern of our lives. Each experience strengthens the pattern and adds color and texture to the overall design.
In our youth we value the shiny, the newness of things. As we mature we understand that there is an inherent beauty in worn and slightly faded. We treasure the wear and tear, we treat the quilt of our life gently and we celebrate the beauty of each and every shred of fabric that tells our own unique story, the story of our lives.